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Three Men and Another Baby
Three Men and Another Baby is episode twenty-one in season three of Full House. It originally aired on April 13, 1990. Opening Teaser Michelle calls Danny and Joey into her room because she says there's a monster in her closet. Joey tells her, "We've been through this 100 times: There's no such thing as monsters", not in her closet, and not even under her bed (though not mentioned, but most kids fear this anyway). She can only reply, "Uh huh, there's a Cookie Monster", to which Joey tells her, "The Cookie Monster is not a real monster. He's just a sugar freak who got stuck with a scary last name." She insists that there are monsters in her closet, and Danny insists there aren't and intends to prove it to her. He goes over and opens the closet door, and surprise, surprise, the "monster" is actually D.J. in disguise and wearing Danny's old Halloween mask. Summary It's Friday, and for Danny, it's "Mop 'til You Drop" Day. But that's not all he has to deal with. He, Joey and Jesse agree to act as babysitters for the Kagans' new baby (and Brian's baby brother), Tony, for a night. When Danny is too busy working to take care of Tony, he asks Jesse to help out. At first, Michelle is happy to see him. Meanwhile, Danny enrolls Comet in obedience school, and it is not making the dog as obedient as Danny would like for him to be. Also, D.J. requests Joey's help in completing a tricky math problem having to do with different kinds of nuts, but when Joey can't seem to figure it out, he resorts to getting some help from a very unlikely source – Mohammed's House of Nuts. Everyone else is in awe over Tony's presence, except Michelle. Jesse reminds her that she's a "big girl" who sleeps in a "big girl" bed and also must learn to share her room with Tony. Tony bonds with Jesse, who lets him sleep in her old crib, lets him play with her toys and sings to him her special bedtime song (" "), generally ignoring her. That leaves a hurt, depressed, and distraught Michelle thinking that Jesse no longer cares about her, much to the groans of the audience. Jesse proves Michelle wrong when Becky makes him realize how hurt he is making Michelle feel. But when Michelle's anxious for Tony to leave, neither Jesse nor Becky are happy with that, and they're also not happy with her "baby"-ish behavior. Both think that rewarding her for being a "big girl" may help change that. At first, Jesse is hesitant, but Becky will reward him with a back rub if he tries it (but still doubting her knowledge of child psychology). He heads to D.J. and Stephanie's room for a solution to this growing problem that turns into an argument involving both girls, but they too agree: If Michelle starts acting like the "big girl" that she truly is, she'll get a reward in the form of a "big girl" toy, with a choice of either D.J's "Pillow Person" or Stephanie's Mr. Bear (see Quotes). The deal is that Michelle must truly commit to her "big girl" attitude, because if she returns to her "baby" attitude, the toy goes back to its owner. Danny returns home having trained Comet to be an obedient dog, but his brother-in-law is still having problems trying to train Michelle to be a "big girl". They both decide the "little Princess/Munchkin" needs communication (see Quotes). And that's what Jesse does: he communicates with Michelle in his room. She says she's not giving "Willie" back, but he wants her to take her focus off "Willie" and focus on him. She says that he likes Tony more than her, but he says that's not true. Though she mentions the song and the crib from earlier, he says it was a way to be nice to her new friend but he should've asked her first or he wouldn't have hurt her feelings like he did. As the inspirational music plays, he says he makes her smile, laugh, and feel good about caring about people, a lot of whom have come in and out of his life. And even though Tony's leaving tomorrow, she'll be his sidekick, #1, buddy, and best pal, no matter what, because he loves her so much. So much so, they give each other a nice, warm, open-arms-wide hug. After the happy moment and the music stops, Stephanie enters and lets her younger sister keep "Willie", but Michelle decides her older sister can have Mr. Bear again, and she gets a kiss just for returning the companion, and Jesse praises his "little Munchkin" for the first "big girl" thing she's done all day. Jesse takes her back to her room, and she promises to be friends with Tony and even allows him to sleep in her crib and play with her toys, another "big girl" thing she's done (as Jeff Franklin's EP credit appears). They leave and let him have his shut-eye (as the audience applauds and Thomas L. Miller and Robert L. Boyett's EP credits appear). Quotes :Michelle: Uncle Jesse, come with me. :Jesse: Michelle, where are we going? :Michelle: To see Tony. :Jesse: What's the matter with Tony? :Michelle: He's still here. ---- :Michelle: Time to go home. Bye-bye, Tony. :Jesse: Michelle, that wasn't cool. You woke up the kid. :Michelle: Good. Now he can go home. :Becky: Oh, Michelle. You don't mean that. :Michelle: Oh, yes I do. ---- :Becky: Hey, Jess, I think Michelle's a little jealous because baby Tony's getting all her Uncle Jesse's attention. Now she wants to be the baby. :Jesse: What would give you a crazy idea like that? :Becky: Well, intuition, instinct... the fact that Michelle's sitting in the crib, sucking her thumb. that's what the camera shows. :Michelle: I'm a baby. :Jesse: Michelle, you're not a baby. You're a big girl. :Michelle: Goo-goo, ga-ga. ---- :Jesse: Alright, Michelle. Now, stop clowning around. You get out of that thing and start showing us what a big girl you are. :Michelle: it Waaaaaa! ---- :[Taking Becky's advice, Jesse heads to the older girls' room, and tries to get some advice out of them.] :Jesse: Listen, girls. I'm having a little problem and I wanna ask you about something. I've been hanging around with Tony and Michelle's getting jealous. You know that Tony's a baby and now Michelle's acting like a baby and I figured I'd give her something special for acting like a big girl. Do you have any suggestions? :D.J.: Well, you know Michelle has had her eye on Mr. Bear ever since she could crawl. :Stephanie: taking Mr. Bear under her arm as if she's afraid he'll be stolen So, what's your point? :D.J.: Well, you always said that one day you would give Mr. Bear to Michelle. :Stephanie: Well, when I said 'one day', I meant, like, her wedding day. Here, why don't you give her your Pillow Person? :D.J.: Because Mr. Bear is a child's toy her sister saying otherwise. My Pillow Person is a sophisticated companion. :Stephanie: Please. 'Sophisticated'? It's got arms and legs growing out of its face. :D.J.: I'' say we let ''Michelle decide. :Stephanie: Fine. With. Me. :exit the room with their 'companions'. :Jesse: That's a stupid-looking pillow. ---- :Michelle enjoys Mr. Bear as her "big girl" toy for now, Stephanie can only ask... :Stephanie: What have I done?! :Jesse: Well, I guess that took care of it. :Becky: Turn around. surprise surprise, Michelle's breaking the stipulations of the deal. :Jesse: Michelle, get out of the crib. :older girls, who've been eavesdropping on this, are shocked..Stephanie more so! :Stephanie: [quickly storming back to Michelle's room] She's back in the crib?! If she's still acting like a baby, the deal is off! I want Mr. Bear back. :Michelle: No! :Jesse: hearing Tony's crying Well, I'll go get Tony a bottle. Take care of this, Beckala? she can't do anything about the ongoing fight. :Stephanie: both girls fight for control Give me Mr. Bear! :Michelle: His name is Willie. :Stephanie: shocked You changed his name? :Michelle: You got it, dude in the thumbs-up. ---- :Jesse warms up Tony's bottle, Danny comes home with Comet. :Danny: Jesse, you are gonna be so proud of this dog. And you're gonna be proud of me too. :Jesse: They taught you to heel? :Danny: No, the instructor taught me how to control Comet. You know, the relationship between a dog and his master can be a beautiful thing. Now behold, the new and improved Comet. unleashes the dog. Comet, lie down. the dog dashes into the living room. Comet. He will lie down eventually. And when he does, I'll be waiting with a doggy yummy. :Jesse: Danny, I'm glad you're here. I'm having a little problem with Michelle. You know how I've been hanging out with Tony? Michelle's starting to freak out. She's acting like a baby. :Danny: Poor kid. How did you handle it? :Jesse: Well, I told her to straighten up and start acting like an adult. :Danny: And when that didn't work, what did you do? :Jesse: Well, we tried giving her a reward for acting like a big girl. :Danny: You tried to bribe her? :Jesse: Don't cheapen it. What should I do? :Danny: I think if you want Michelle to act like a big girl you have to talk to her like she's a big girl in words that she'll understand. :Jesse: You got it, dude in the thumbs-up just like Michelle. ---- Jesse and Michelle have their "little talk", Stephanie enters. :Jesse: Michelle, I've been thinking about it, and, you know, you might need that bear more than I do. So have a nice life with Mr. Bear--I mean Willie. :Michelle: Here, you can have Mr. Bear. :Stephanie: Michelle, I love you so much. :Michelle: Everybody loves me. gets a big fat kiss from her older sister. That was a wet kiss. :Jesse: I'm hip. Come here. Let me yell you something, Michelle. That was very nice that you gave the bear back. You really are a big girl. :Michelle: I'm hip. ---- :Michelle: Tony Night night, Tony. :Jesse: Aww, Michelle, that's so sweet. :Michelle: Tony You're going home tomorrow, remember? Trivia *The last of six episodes to use the extended theme song this season *The episode title is a take on the 1988 movie *The second (and last) appearances of Joyce and Michael Kagan, and the only appearance of Brian Kagan's baby brother, Tony Category:Season 3 Category:Episodes